Ready, Set, Go

My race is tomorrow!  I am so excited I can hardly sit still.  I know it is going to be hard, but I'm just ready to do it and get it done.  Can't wait for the endorphins and adrenaline and all the fun with my crazy relay team.

Will be wearing this headlamp (and an equally dorky expression, no doubt)  for the midnight run.

This Sunday I started training for a different kind of run.  I was asked to be the president of the Relief Society at church.  Basically a full-time job.

Like running a Ragnar, being an RS President is not something I EVER thought I'd do.  But here I am.  At the starting line.  Hoping my muscles are strong enough.  Nervous and excited.  Ready to have fun with my new team.

The blog will undoubtedly suffer...but I promise to post along the way...

Wish me luck!!!

No, I'm Not Dead. But My Laptop Might Be.

Everyone close your eyes right now and say a little Christmas prayer for the Gabtop 3000.  She is in the fight of her life, trying to survive a bout with a deadly online virus.  Terminal illness is never convenient.  But in the month of December, it can be particularly painful.  And since Brad's big old bulky desktop isn't really a fan of snuggling by the Christmas tree, my online shopping (not to mention my cyber social life) is suffering.  Big Time.

But here is what I have been doing in my screen-free time:

Moving to a new place is like going to a new high school.  You find yourself trying new things.  Hanging out with a different crowd. Taking new classes, inventing a new persona. Insecure teens might get talked into drugs or alcohol.  Insecure 40 year olds might get talked into running a 24 hour overnight relay.

Yes, I am running the Ragnar Del Sol in less than three months.  No, I have never done anything remotely like this in my entire life.  Yes, I am racing with 11 other Mormon moms.  (We have approximately 55 kids between the 12 of us and are seriously considering the team name "Sister Wives.")  Yes, I am training every day.  No, I have not experienced any notable weight-loss.  But, yes, it is surprisingly fun and addictive.

The kids are running too.  I guess 24/7 sunshine just makes everybody want to lace up the sneakers.  The PE teacher sponsors a twice-weekly running club after school, so that's where we can all be found Tuesday and Thursday afternoons.  Some of us are fast, some of us are slow.  Some of us whine and some of us glow. Needless to say, the backseat of the minivan is not the place you want to be on a Tuesday or Thursday afternoon.  Post-run showers are mandatory.

So this is the part where I ask any runners out there for advice on shoes or training or good music for the iPod.  In the past, my eyes would completely glaze over when I encountered any running posts...so I promise not to get zealous.

 And, if the sick laptop ever makes a miraculous holiday recovery, I will post photos of our Christmas Casa!

Hives at our Hive

It started with a tummy ache and fever. It ended with a serious case of leprosy. At least, that's what my overactive mombrain decided.

Luckily, the doctor said it was just a virus and all these things are typical back-to-school symptoms. A little cortizone cream, a low-dose steroid and everything is all cleared up.

In the meantime, I had a chatty daytime buddy most of the week and Sam's fantasies of life as an only child were temporarily fulfilled.

We spent a lot of time talking about his plans for the future, which include (in no particular order): becoming a chef, having 12 children, living next door to me, attending BYU, marrying a beautiful girl, going to Legoland and working as a cashier at Fry's.

Sam is a delightful child.

Late Breaking News

Luke is officially a man now.

Until last night, he was the only male in the family to have his original, God-given bone structure intact. And I think he was a little embarassed about it.

But, anyone acquainted with Luke knew that his days as a fracture-virgin were numbered. All it took was a late night tee-ball practice, a dare-devil move on the climbing structure and a pair of slippery sneakers.

Snap! Broken humeris and his initiation into the Broken Bone Boys Club was complete.

We're very proud.

In another health-related story, Jake's upper braces were removed yesterday. Fifth-grade girls everywhere are reporting heart palpitations.

(You haven't seen his retainer anywhere, have you?)

And, finally, I am happy to report that Emily won the flower arranging contest sponsored by her school! She will compete in the district competition later this month. Her brothers were not impressed until they heard about the grand prize: $200 cash.

Now they think it's the coolest thing you can do around here...without breaking a bone.

Just Me and My Carb Face

A couple of weeks ago, I checked out this book from the library. Occasionally I enjoy reading diet books. Preferably while eating, of course. This one looked like it would go nicely with a big chocolate chip cookie. So I brought it home.

My philosophy about diet books is the same as my philosophy about parenting books. If I read a good parenting book, I feel like I am a good parent. Even if my parenting behavior has not changed. Same with a good diet book. I read it and instantly feel thinner.

But this book made a believer out of me. The author of this one made a claim that caught my attention. On page 188, Dr. Gullo promised that I could lose my carb face in 10 days.

What is a carb face? You may wonder. Well, here's what the book says,

"If you've ever looked closely at a person who has...binged on carbohydrates, his face often looks puffy and distended. This is what some of us who work in the field of weight management call the 'carb face.' "

I totally have a carb face.

But only for nine more days.

That's right, ladies and gentlemen! I have already completed one-tenth of the 10-day Gullo TurboCharge Diet. Just in time for Thanksgiving, too.

All I have to do is eat egg whites, fish, cottage cheese, and grapefruit for the next 240 hours. But don't worry, I won't starve to death. See, I get to have unlimited quantities of ice water, green vegetables, and sugar-free gum.

I don't want to be a size 2. I don't want to run a marathon. But I am fascinated by the thought of losing my carb face. So I'm going to try it. And I will keep you all in the loop.

Stay tuned.

Source: The Thin Commandments by Stephen Gullo, PhD [Rodale Books, 2005]

The Day the Vaccine Came to Town

My mom still remembers the day she got her polio shot. It was an historical and traumatizing event in her young life.

My kids had their own historical moment yesterday when the H1N1 vaccine finally came to town.

We stood in a line that wrapped around the high school with 11,000 of our closest friends and neighbors.

I have to confess that I dreaded the whole thing for days--the crowds, the crying, the craziness.

But I was pleasantly surprised. There were hundreds of volunteers, community helpers and medical staff.

The line moved quickly, the paperwork was minimal, the organization was simply fantastic.

My kids each took some big snorts with their little snouts.

And that's the last time they'll act like swine this season.

I hope.

The Perfect Pause

"Bittersweet October. The mellow, messy, leaf-kicking, perfect pause between the opposing miseries of summer and winter."

- Carol Bishop Hipps

Ahhhhctober... I love it so much.

Yesterday Brad left for Palm Springs. Any other month I would be completely green with envy. But the thought of leaving crisp mornings, golden afternoons and cozy evenings is unthinkable. (Which is convenient, since me leaving for Palm Springs is equally unthinkable at the mo. I'm crazy busy and the kids are just plain crazy. So no California for me. Oh well...)

Our neck of the woods is so amazingly gorgeous right now. I was thinking that I wish someone would invent a Weather TiVo. Seriously, wouldn't it be so great if you could just record a couple of Indian Summer days and replay them during August's hideous humidity? Or after a string of grey January bummers? I'm surprised nobody is marketing this yet.

Of course, October has its bittersweet moments. In the four weeks since school started, I have had three sick children. Today it's Lukey's turn. Stomach troubles and fever. I worry most about Mr. Luke when he gets sick. Maybe because he had a rocky start in the NICU or maybe the Lyme disease...which is technically still in his system. He just seems to be the most fragile of my litter.

But I like having him home alone. It's rare that we have bonding time without Sam around. Right now it's just the two of us (and Tom and Jerry, of course) along with ginger ale, dry toast and a curly straw.

In other family news, Jake is learning to cook! He made this Banana Cream Pie last week. Other new specialties include Peanut Butter Brownies and Lemon Cake. Is there anything better than a guy who can bake?

Yes! A guy who changes diapers. He assisted me in babysitting this little cutie last week. I have noticed that Jake is extremely tender and patient with babies and animals. Shall I get him one? (Kidding)

In a rare crafty moment, I made these centerpieces for a going-away party we hosted for dear friends. Apples were the motif of the evening, so we served hot spiced cider and "Mormon champagne" (cold cider and ginger ale) alongside Pumpkin Gingerbread Trifle. So good...

Last but not least, today our driveway was recoated! Doesn't it look good?

Babe, I took these photos just for you. Enjoy your California sunshine. I'll be crusin' on this smooth stuff and enjoying beautiful Ahhhhctober!

p.s. Happy to report my dad is home from the hospital and celebrating his 63rd birthday today!

Happy Birthday, Opa!

Payback

Dear Dad,

Remember my "F" in 8th grade Algebra? Remember the time I had salmonella poisoning? Or measles in Disneyland? How about the broken arm fiasco of 1981?

Remember the time you came to check on an innocent sleepover and found me in a van with a questionable crowd? Remember the day(s) I wrecked my car(s)?

Remember the worries? The stomach aches? The desperate prayers?

Did you ever wonder if I'd grow up and get it?

Well, I did and I do. And, today? You totally got me back.

Glad you're OK. Love you! Just don't let it happen again.

Your concerned daughter,
Gab

p.s. You're grounded.

The Final Straw

Clearly the men in my life are not meant to ride bicycles.

As if this, this and this weren't proof enough...

Doesn't it break your heart?

Santa's bringing training wheels for everyone this year.

Humbled

Is there anything scarier than watching your child fight for breath? If there is, I don't want to know about it.

Last night I was reminded again how helpless a parent can be. Since asthma is dominant on both family trees, I panicked when Sam struggled for air last night. Thankfully, Brad had flown in only an hour earlier and was able to bless him, calm me, and make a midnight visit to the ER. It wasn't an asthma attack, only a really bad case of croup.

One nebulizer treatment, one dose of steroid, and--most importantly--one official hospital bracelet later, Sam is home and breathing easy.

Thank Goodness.

Feelin' Cheeky

This is what I look like today after a little oral surgery "procedure".

Direct quote from the surgeon: "Your molar had longer roots than any woman I've ever seen before...except one patient from the Congo."

Thankfully, Ilene shared this delicious frozen hot chocolate recipe. So I'm enjoying that.

The Vicodin isn't too bad, either.

Before & After

Remember, this?

One year later.

Happy Healiversary, Babe! You're better than ever...

Gag Me With an Endoscope

My date this morning...

My dress size does not reflect this, but the truth is I have trouble swallowing. As early as junior high school, I remember choking on my Parker House rolls at lunch. Later on it was hot dogs at ball games, pizza at parties, and French dip sandwiches in front of my impressionable new in-laws. Highly embarassing.

I have learned to compensate by drinking lots of water, taking small bites and avoiding the foods that are most difficult to get down. (Cheesecake, by the way, is never a problem.) But a few years ago, I was diagnosed with a Schatzki ring--a membrane in my throat. Every five years or so, I go and get it "stretched."

Today was stretch day. No big deal. A nice long nap in the middle of the day, with a surprisingly spacious esophagus when I wake up.

Bring on the French dip!

Lime Disease

So the bad news is that Luke's test came back positive. But the good news is that we caught it early. Amoxicillin three times a day for 21 days! Yikes. Luckily, this child loves taking medicine.

The doctor says he should be just fine and he is definitely acting healthier and up to all his old tricks already!

SuperOma is here and just having someone witness the chaos that is my life always makes me feel a little more sane. No...you really aren't going crazy...you just live in a zoo!

Lisa-Marie requested a Lyme Disease poem. But my heart is just not in it. Here is my lame attempt:

Ticks, ticks... they make you sick.

Please keep my little guy in your thoughts and prayers. And eat a slice of Key Lyme Pie in our honor!

Happy Tails

Thanks to all of you wellwishers for your love and concern.

My better-half's better half is healing slowly but surely.

Now I can truly say that I am NOT his biggest

pain in the rump!

Who needs a coccyx, anyway?

I Hope It's Not Your Coccyx!

My little brothers and I used to watch a certain 1972 Barbra Streisand/Ryan O'Neal movie over and over back when VCR's were a cool new invention.

In one crazy scene, madcap Barb is rushing around O'Neal's character asking if he is hurt and which bones are broken. To quote: "Do you think you broke your coccyx? I hope it's not your coccyx!"

Can you name the movie? Check your answer here....by the way, I think it is a great flick and would be a fun Labor Day weekend repeat.

Well, I always wanted to have something in common with Ms. Streisand...and now I do. Someone I love has broken his coccyx!

If you missed my cutie pie's spill on the hills last spring, you may not realize that he has been in mountain-bike-rehab all summer long. Fortunately, most of his body is back to its everyday studliness...but his tailbone is out of whack.

Tomorrow he goes under the knife for a little coccyx-removal and won't be able to sit down for awhile. Please keep him in your prayers (and say an extra one for me)!

As The Gab Blog Turns...Episode 39

In this exciting episode, we find our hero in the hospital for a brief stay due to a daring bike stunt gone wrong.

Bad jump+crazy landing=Broken clavicle, scapula, 4 broken ribs and a partially collapsed lung.

Bummer, dude!

Tune in next time for more crazy adventures...

All I Really Need to Know I Learned at Spin Class

Tues and Thurs mornings 6 am...I am there! Early morning spin class is the highlight of my week. (Unfortunately, the other joy in my life is eating raw brownie batter and I think the two cancel each other out...) Nevertheless, spin has taught me some important lessons that I think can be applied to the rest of our lives....

1. Always position yourself near a fan; avoid sitting near men in sweatbands.

2. You can never have too much water.

3. Be nice to high school cheerleaders, they will grow up to be your instructor.

4. Do not judge others' abilities, they just may have more resistance on their bikes.

5. Do not judge your own ability, you can handle more tension than you think.

6. Downhill sprints are much more fun than uphill climbs.

7. Listening to "Beautiful Day" by U-2 makes any climb bearable.

8. Take time to breathe.

9. Wearing expensive gear doesn't make up for lack of talent.

10. Always wipe down the seat when you're done.