Monday, April 27, 2009

Everything That I Am Thinking About Right This Very Minute

You know when your stomach hurts and you're just so nauseous you actually WANT to throw up? Because as soon as everything's out and not just churning inside, you'll just feel so much better?

That's how my brain feels right now.

So I'm just going to do one giant blog upchuck and share my brain nausea with the world. Hopefully having it out and not just churning inside, I'll feel much better...

  1. Turning Five. Sam and Luke turn five tomorrow. And, clearly, the best way to celebrate the fifth anniversary of your emergency C-section is to invite 20 hyper four-year-olds to your house for a magic show and balloon animals. (Note to self: See if magician can possibly bring an anesthesiologist to party.)
  2. But No Seriously. I am having mixed feelings about my babies turning five. How many long days and sleep-deprived nights did I think to myself, If I can only survive the first five years... And I did survive. And it was harder than I thought it would be, but better too. And now I don't have babies anymore. So who am I?
  3. The Home Office. Remember how worried I was about Brad working at home? Well, I love it. Really. It is great that he can come home for dinner right when it's ready. And that I don't have to hurry home to meet the schoolbus anymore. He leaves me alone and vice versa. It is an ideal situation. 99% of the time. Unfortunately, today was the other 1%. Enough said. Love you, Babe.
  4. Dressing for the Derby. I have finally decided upon a dress and even found a hat to match. Some cute spectator pumps too. Now I just need a few final accessories and a cute bag to tie it all together. Since it is work-related, Brad is unusually interested in the whole thing and actually encouraging my shopping habit. Frankly, I don't know how to handle his involvement. One question for all my fashion savvy friends--stockings: yes or no? Brad doesn't have an I need yours.
  5. And, of course, All Roads Lead to Hair. So the next question is what to do with it? You know, as soon as I put that hat on, my 'do is dead for the day. So should I try to be smooth? Or should I just carry the hat and attempt Big Hair? It is the South, after all. My stylist, Danielle, suggested that I spend the next few days experimenting. Hello? Does she think I'm in ninth grade? Danielle dear, I should have said, the only hair experiment this mother of four can handle is the one where she counts how many days she can go without shampooing before people begin to complain. (FYI: Two and one-half days. I have very fine hair and I'm a head-sweater, like my mother. Thanks, Mom!)
  6. I Have Got To Go To Bed.

Thank you all for listening. I DO feel much better. I just need a couple saltines and some ginger ale.


Bridget said...

20?! yeah, good luck with that. That birthday package should come with Valium.

marta said...

good luck with the big birthday bash. those babies deserve it, they are so so darn cute. and you will deserve the best mom in the world award.

have fun!

wenderful said...

Have fun at the party! Congratulations on making it to 5!
I say no hose. But I ALWAYS say no hose.
And go with the straight hair but plan on wearing the hat the whole time.
How fun! Wish I were going.

Celia Fae said...

Wendy must have hot legs with no veins. I would do invisible hose for personal confidence.

Sorry about the one percent. I was feeling your pain today also.

Lindsey said...

I hope that tummy settles down. Don't you wish that someone would just take care of you??? Good luck with the birthday party!

Jeanelle said...

Start doing the jergens daily glow lotion or another brand -- 3 days in a row of that and you have a nice amount of color on your legs so no stockings. And I agree with Ms Wenderful -- straight hair and hat on the whole time. I wish I had more to offer but while you're all messed up inside, at least you're gonna look amazing, right??? Hang in there...xoxo

Travelin'Oma said...

You're much cooler than me. My head sweats just thinking about a hat. I'd definitely carry it. If it's humid at all and your fluffy hair flattens, you can put on the hat, and then leave it on for a mini-makeover in the middle of the race. No hose. My head sweats thinking of those, too.

The magician party is a perfect way to celebrate those miracle boys. Your whole motherhood experience has been miraculous!

Rochelleht said...

NO to hose! NO, NO, NO!

As a pale redhead, I can say that if you are white, just use a bottle tanner.

Christie said...

Go get a spray-on tan. YOU WILL LOVE IT. It will give you just a slight glow - it evens out your skin tone more than actually makes you look tan. Plus, it's totally safe and takes all of two minutes. Do that, and do not wear hose. Especially in the south. You'll be miserable.

I CANNOT, CANNOT, CANNOT believe those boys are five. Where has the time gone? Seems like I was just feeding a bottle to "pukey lukey" while all my three kids destroyed your basement.

polly said...

I have a friend that went to the Kentucky derby and she carried her hat. (she also has hair issues, but i'll check with her to get the low down on what everyone else does. I agree with christie about the spray tan and no nylons deal..way too hot. plus that will give your face a lovely glow as well! (you'll need a little glow after the 20 sleepover thing)

Meg said...

I can SO relate to this post except that I don't have twin five year olds....only one. Although, it feels like twins somedays. I make my kids switch friend birthdays every other year so out of the 4 kids, I am only doing 2 a year. That is what I can handle. But I don't have twins.

My youngest is 5 too. I am in the same phase...Who am I? (is right)

And I am with many of the others on the hose is probably the best.

I also feel like my brain is going to explode.

Holly said...

I agree with Bridget! 20 littles...oh my!

Who are you now? Well an awesome wife and mom who will move into the next phase of mommyness with grace, wisdom and a dash of humor.

I vote bare legs.

Lauren in GA said...

Okay, firstly...I love that you are looking into the possibility of an anesthesiologist attending the party. That's a good call. You could also see if he could dose you with some Nubane.(sp?) They dosed me with that before Brian was delivered...Ahhhhhh, good stuff.

I know who you are. You are an amazing incredible writer and an amazing mom and wife.

(Sorry about the 1% kind of day)

Oh, my! I bet the spectator pumps are to DIE for!

I like the idea the other ladies had about self tanners or spray on tans. I say wear the hat, though...wear a sleek style and wear the hat. The derby is ALL about the hat.

Have so, so, so much fun!!

martha corinna said...

Man, how can I get shopping for clothes to be work related?

Good luck with the birthday. You are an awesome mom.

Emy5 said...

It's hard to feel that your kids are not babies anymore, but you made it to five years and with flying colours.

Sorry, I'm no help on the hose matter, but I wish I could see your hat!

Karen & Joe said...

No hose - Jergens cream will give a nice glow
Carry the hat and plop it on when needed for photo ops
Babies are forever! Luke and Sam (Jake & Em too!) are so lucky to have such a fabulously talented Mom who writes the BEST blogs that make people smile, cry, think and just feel good. Have a great time and look forward to the pix from the Derby!

jessica said...

NO HOSE!!!! Unless they are fishnet.

Jenibelle said...

I can not wait to see the Derby outfit! And you totally have to wear the hat.

diane said...

So you get why I'm so lost when I think about my girl graduating in one year right?

No stockings please. I am giddy with excitement for the unveiling of the outfit. Spectator shoes, shut up. I adore them. My man likes me to look good for business stuff too. I always comply.

Wear the hat. Tuck the hair behind your ears. Tres chic.

diane said...

I should say I comply by busting the budget. Wouldn't want our men to look bad. It's fun to be arm candy once in awhile.

Ilene said...

I hope you had a lovely time at the derby. We missed you!

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