Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Target: It's Like Preschool, But It's Free...sort of...

Opting to save the double tuition and feeling stressed about meeting the requisite September potty-training deadline, I decided to keep the twins out of preschool this year. Instead of schlepping them off to fingerpaint, eat raisins and have circle time, I choose to make each day a learning adventure with Mom.
I am especially good at field trips.
Today's destination: Target.
Learning objective: Children will identify and understand principles of basic mechanical engineering.
To meet this objective, I drove past our boring-old-everyday-non-field-trip Target and pulled into the fancy Target 45 minutes away. My boys are quite enamored of this particular store since it has "magic stairs"...not just a regular escalator for people...


...but also a groovy "carts only" escalator!



They spent a good 25 minutes watching this. If Target ever wants to make even more money from poor unsuspecting moms like me, all they have to do is make a DVD of the cart escalator. Guaranteed bestseller with the under-5 male demographic.


Learning Objective: Children will practice independent hygiene skills.

Check.

(We haven't quite mastered the use-less-paper-save-the-earth objective...)

Learning Objective: Children will blend primary colors to make secondary colors.

Red ICEE plus white ICEE makes pink ICEE. Check.

Learning Objective: Children will practice table manners and sharing.

The boys did nicely sharing one ICEE and one pretzel between themselves.

Mom, however, showed signs of immaturity when asked for a sip of her soda. Maybe she needs more field trips...


Learning Objective: Children will demonstrate an ability to take turns and stand in line.

...and learn patience with the trainee cashier, and not throw tantrums when denied gum and packs of batteries, and not bash the woman in front of us (and her 2,800 coupons) with our bright red shopping cart...

Check. (Sort of)

Learning Objective: Children will learn math facts.

One trip to Target + one mom + two boys = a smaller bank balance

(But it's still cheaper than double tuition!!!)

Next week's learning adventure: TJ MAXX






17 comments:

Bridget said...

That was so funny. Way to make learning fun, entertaining for the rest of us and cost beneficial for you! Did your boys really watch that escalator for 25 minutes?? Those escalators with the carts are pretty fancy.

Mique said...

You are so "my people." Too bad we don't live closer (like at least on the same side of the country). I'd love to have preschool lessons at Target with your boys and my Drew.
And I'm impressed that your teacher skills can be put to use anywhere.

Paige said...

Spending money at Target AND saving money on tuition. I think you just hit the genius level here.

Marty said...

You have the coolest stores! Who else has a grocery store with an electric train running around the vegetable section?

Lisa-Marie said...

Seriously cool Target. I've only HEARD of the two story mega stores. I'm jealous! And I think I would be enamored with the magic cart stairs too. Does your pre-school enroll 30 year olds?!?!?

Stie: My Favorite Things said...

I think you have come up with a genius solution. Sure, sending them to preschool allows you a quick trip to Target. But usually, you have to rush through to you can pick them up on time. This way, you can stay there all day AND they get preschool. Smart AND economical.

This was too funny!

Lauren said...

This was such a clever post. You are a fabulous educator and writer!

I had no idea that "magic stairs" sometimes have a "carts only" escalator right next to them. I was entertained by, and learned from this great post!

HILLARY said...

I like those kinds of learning lessons. Our children learn best when we talk to them. And when their grown, they will understand their wife's need to go to Target!

lainakay said...

Very similar to Cha-Cha's preschool experience this year, only hers mostly consists of watching Mommy type on the computer. Keyboarding skills... very important!

I wanna see the cart escalator, too! How cool!

Amanda said...

I love this! I am glad to know that I can now justify my trips to Target as educational. DH will be so pleased.

Caroline said...

I'm amazed that your Target is 2 stories. That's AMAZING.

And I'm so glad that I'm not the only one who hasn't potty-trained people...

Holly said...

This girl's gotta know: Are you accepting applications for enrollment? Your preschool ROCKS!!

You are a mom after my own heart. Seriously.

BTW, shopping at a Target like that would be soooo cool and I'm a grown-up. But I don't usually share sips of my soda either. So I'm barely a grown up.

martha corinna said...

This is a cute post.
Target is too tempting for me, and I fear that I still have to learn the same budgeting lessons over and over from Target. Although, I don't get the feeling that they want me to learn that lesson.

John Holly Levi & Faith said...

I didn't know that there were targets with magic escalators that held your cart too! WOW! I feel so jipped by my own white trash target now.

Your posts are so so clever. Love them.

crystal said...

An escalator for carts??? I feel so small-town.

Heidiram said...

Your post was one of the last ones I read last night before going to bed. Guess what I dreamed about last night? Cool Targets that have escalators.

Can I go ahead and enroll my daughter in your pre-school? She qualified for the special needs pre-school, but of course they don't have any openings available until August. That and I've tried educating my own children before and it just doesn't work. It causes way too much family friction. My kids do way better when their mom is not their teacher.

TexasTwinsTwice said...

SUPER creative idea! I can tell you were/are a good teacher to be able to tie that all in so well! Your kids are adorable!

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